Novel Bin Chapter 16: Emotional Baby Steps (2)
Chapter 16: Emotional Baby Steps (2)
TL/Editor: Raei
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Song Soo-yeon was aware of it herself.
She knew that though she had grown physically, her social skills were lacking.
Not just in social skills, but in many other aspects, she was still at the beginner's stage.
There was so much she didn't know.
Things that an average person would naturally learn, she had not properly been taught.
For example... friendship.
When he said, 'We're just friends,' Song Soo-yeon didn't quite understand it.
Of course, she knew the word.
But she didn't understand the emotions shared between friends, how they acted for each other, and where the line was drawn between a friend and a stranger.
So, when he said that they were just friends, she was still confused.
After finishing their conversation and as he was about to leave, Song Soo-yeon ultimately stopped him.
"....But what do you mean by we're just friends?"
She asked honestly.
It seemed important to clarify what he meant now.
Though such a question was embarrassing, now was not the time for that.
It had to be done.
It was like the tense and anxious moment of making her first contract in life.
She became meticulous, fearing deception in any unverified details.
Hearing her question, he sat back down.
"....It means to maintain things just as they are now."
"....Just as they are now...?"
"Ah, not exactly like this... um..."
He seemed to struggle, rubbing his chin as if in thought.
Song Soo-yeon waited patiently.
"We'll probably become closer than now, but there should be a certain line we don't cross... The basic feeling remains the same as now."
"........."
She still couldn't understand.
....And she didn't want to probe further.
He had said he also lacked friends.
Looking at his face, she felt he was as clueless as she was.
She didn't want to pressure someone like that.
And, to be honest... she liked the sound of 'becoming closer.'
She too wanted to get closer to him.
But in addition, there was the clause of not doing anything the other disliked.
Truthfully, she was somewhat afraid.
He liked her.
That's why he had done everything for her until now.
It was the same for Song Soo-yeon.
She hadn't liked anyone more than him yet.
Because apart from him, she had never formed a bond with anyone else.
Such positive feelings were a first for her.
The affection he offered on the rooftop, at the edge of her life, still warmed her heart.
So, she greatly appreciated it and had grown to like him more, but even she couldn't gauge the depth of these feelings.
As there was no one to compare with.
Not knowing the depth of her affection meant she also couldn't predict how she might change.
Another reason she liked him was that he never gave her the creepy looks or physical contacts that made her uncomfortable.
If he tries the same thing as other men in the future, how would she feel?
...Would she feel disgusted, like she did with other men?
Song Soo-yeon didn't want to feel such revulsion towards him.
She didn't want to let him go.
Though it was faint, she was sure she felt that way.
If this feeling meant they could become closer without any discomfort, there was nothing better for her.
She couldn't express it in words, but this was her true feeling.
Eventually, she nodded her head.
Song Soo-yeon followed Jung-gyeom to his house.
Though she trusted him, she couldn't help but feel nervous.
The more she trusted him, the more devastating it would be if it turned out to be a betrayal.
Of course, his foolish-looking face was reassuring. He didn't seem like he would pounce on her.
Despite this, she hesitated without realizing, prompting Jung-gyeom to speak with a troubled tone.
"......If you're uncomfortable, you can go back home. I wont stop you.
Home.
The thought jolted Song Soo-yeon's mind.
She didn't want to return to the worst path now that another option had emerged.
"It's not like that."
Song Soo-yeon gathered her courage and closely followed behind him.
Soon they arrived at a shabby building.
It looked to be about four stories high, much like Song Soo-yeon's house.
Jung-gyeom confidently headed to the second floor and opened a door.
-Tick.
He entered the room, turning on the light, and the one-room apartment brightened.
.......
Song Soo-yeon had still secretly hoped he was wealthy.
She couldn't understand why someone would spend so much money for others.
She never realized trusting people could be this difficult.New novel chapt𝒆rs are published on novel(b)in(.)com
Only after seeing his home did she believe he wasn't that wealthy.
It seemed he lived quite minimally, excluding just the essentials.
Living so simply himself, yet helping others.
Just seeing his room gave her a glimpse into his life philosophy, and Song Soo-yeon's guard lowered a notch, recognizing once more that he was a good person.
Come in.
Jung-gyeom took off his shoes and entered.
Song Soo-yeon also took off the slippers she had borrowed from the restaurant and stepped inside.
The room was clean and refreshing.
It was a stark contrast to her filthy house.
Only now did she realize a home could be this clean.
Take a seat. I'll get you some water. Let's have a chat.
As Song Soo-yeon awkwardly sat on the floor, he approached with two glasses of water.
After handing her the glasses, he unfolded a small table and sat opposite her.
Song Soo-yeon, for some reason, found it hard to look directly at him.
Ever since he rescued her, she had felt this way.
She wanted to look at him, but she couldn't.
As she fidgeted, Jung-gyeom asked,
"....You were saving up for a deposit, right?"
".......Yes."
"How much did you save?"
".....5 million won."
Thinking of the money now gone, Song Soo-yeon answered with a heavy heart.
"Hmm. Can you find a room with that money these days?"
"....The cheapest room, yes."
He slowly nodded, seemingly feeling sorry for her, but he didn't verbalize his pity.
".....How were you saving up until now?"
"Distributing flyers... doing day labor."
"Hmm. Haven't found a regular job?"
"....To sign a work contract as a high school student, I need parental consent."
"Ah."
The conversation inadvertently touched a sore spot, leading to a moment of silence.
Honestly, she couldn't understand why he was asking these questions.
Normally, she would have responded bluntly, attacking back, but in his room, she felt too tense.
It just made her reflect on her dire situation.
No matter how much warmth he shared with her, the reality hadn't changed.
After drinking a glass of water, Jung-gyeom said,
"Then, stay here until you save up the deposit."
"......What?"
Song Soo-yeon's mind went blank.
She doubted she had heard him correctly.
"Stay until I save up...?"
"If I was just going to let you stay for one day, there would be no point in bringing you here."
He wasn't wrong.
But she hadn't expected such a proposal.
Was he saying she didn't have to go back home?
Could she really escape her parents now?
Was he pulling her out of one hell?
Her fists clenched tightly, and warmth flooded in again.
She couldn't understand why tears threatened to fall.
She bit her lip hard.
That warmth didn't stop there.
"And work part-time at my restaurant. Let's just do hourly wage times the hours. Since you can't sign a labor contract."
"...Mister..."
Song Soo-yeon's eyes began to quiver.
She found it harder and harder to look at him.
"I need help too. Running the restaurant alone, theres so much I cant do... Though, not many people come in."
"........."
Song Soo-yeon held her breath and then inhaled, trying to swallow her tears.
She didn't want to break down and cry here.
Really, she kept getting surprised.
She never imagined human warmth could be so comforting.
She didn't know how to express this overwhelming feeling and gratitude.
In the end, she did what she always did.
"......Ah.. you just want to live with a high school girl, right.."
But her voice betrayed her, quivering and tearful, revealing her insincerity.
He seemed to realize it too, chuckling lightly as he gently pushed her head.
...Oh, really.
"......I won't forget... that you're a pervert... you know...."
"Why make me out to be a pervert? Thats not what I want.
Song Soo-yeon finally couldn't hold back her tears and discreetly wiped them away with her fingers.
'What he wants.'
Yes, she knew exactly what he wanted.
After hesitating for a while, she whispered in a very small voice.
".....Thank you, mister."
A bright smile spread across his face again.
"............."
Song Soo-yeon watched his smile, unable to explain the emotions welling up inside her.
It was a feeling she had never experienced before.
Her heart raced faster.
She wanted to etch this scene into her memory forever.
She couldn't take her eyes off him.
But that happiness was fleeting.
He got up from his seat.
"Right, you had a busy day. Now it's time to rest."
Caught off guard, Song Soo-yeon heard him speak.
He started to gather his coat, getting ready to leave.
"......?"
Confused, Song Soo-yeon watched as Jung-gyeom began putting on his shoes.
"....Where... where are you going?"
"....Hmm?"
"......?"
They exchanged puzzled looks.
After a moment of staring, Jung-gyeom finally asked.
"....Do you have anything else to say?"
"....No?"
"Then I should go."
"...Go where?"
Another strange silence fell.
As time passed, a look of surprise settled on Jung-gyeom's face.
"What, you thought we were going to sleep together?"
"What?!"
Song Soo-yeon yelled in shock.
It wasn't that she wanted to sleep with him; she was just flustered by the thought of him leaving the house empty.
Where in the world is there a landlord who vacates their own house for you?
And it's not just for a day or two.
Song Soo-yeon, having already envisioned a future living with him, couldn't help but be surprised by this twist.
"No, not that, but where will you sleep..."
"I'll sleep at the restaurant. You said men scare you, didnt you? You wont be able to sleep if I'm here.
"....So... you're leaving the house for me..?"
In my experience, it's better to sleep with a peaceful mind than a comfortable body. I won't be able to sleep thinking you might go back to your house.
"........"
Song Soo-yeon couldn't hold back the words starting to form in her heart.
Why was he going to such lengths for her?
How was she supposed to repay all this?
Why was he so warm-hearted?
Never having received anyone's kindness before, she was overwhelmed by receiving so much all at once.
Despite being only three years older, why did he seem so much more mature?
It was somewhat infuriating.
Why didn't he take care of himself?
Shouldn't he look after himself too?
Again, she didn't want him to see how she felt.
She resorted to a familiar tactic.
".....Mister, you're really... too much of a pushover..."
It was all she knew how to say.
".......Trying to do something good, and still called a pushover."
"....Giving everything away to strangers, if that's not a pushover, what is it...?"
He seemed to ponder for a moment, then smiled and said.
"We agreed to be friends. Why did you call yourself a stranger?"
"........"
Song Soo-yeon found herself speechless again.
She couldn't bring herself to say anything nasty in response.
Jung-gyeom, as if he had said all he needed to, waved his hand lightly in farewell and, without any hesitation, reached for the door handle.
"Sleep well."
He said.
Song Soo-yeon tried to respond, but her throat tightened, and she couldn't utter a word.
Meanwhile, he closed the door and left.
Song Soo-yeon remained seated, unable to move for a long time.
---
---
After showering, Song Soo-yeon sat on the bed.
She couldn't remember the last time she felt such peace.
Even when she tried to find something to worry about, nothing came to mind.
She had escaped her parents.
Those two addicts wouldn't be able to find her now.
They didn't even know which school she attended, and she was almost graduating anyway.
The bullying at school had stopped too.
Thanks to the mister boldly confronting 'Shake' and shouting, a hero had been dispatched to the school.
And now, she could earn money.
This too was possible because of the mister's consideration.
And even this warm home.
It had been barely a month since she met the mister.
All her worries had been resolved, all thanks to his help.
-Drip... Drip...
She realized she was shedding tears without even knowing it.
Even though she wasn't overwhelmed with emotion, the tears that started flowing just wouldn't stop.
It still felt unreal that all her pain and suffering had disappeared so easily.
One thing was certain: when she closed her eyes and focused, she could feel a huge warmth in her heart.
.........She wasn't lonely anymore.
She had learned the warmth of people.
In this damned world, she found hope, her own hero.
She felt at ease.
It was unbelievably blissful.
All strength drained from her body.
Song Soo-yeon naturally lay down on the bed.
"......Ah."
The familiar scent rose from the blanket.
It was the scent of the mister she had smelled when she was carried on his back.
With no one watching, Song Soo-yeon slowly wrapped herself in the blanket.
The more she did, the more it felt like he was right beside her, filling her heart.
What was the name of this emotion?
Newly stepping into the world of various emotions, she didn't know.
......It didn't matter.
After all, they had promised to stay the same, unchanging.